Virtuous Girlhood

Writing Tips: Some Great Links!

Thanks Sarah for your tips!

http://wordplay-kmweiland.blogspot.com/

http://christiswrite.blogspot.com/

http://jessica-literarypursuits.blogspot.com/

http://sunshineaspirations.blogspot.com/

Sorry I just didn’t have time for a better post!

Writing Tips: 10 Ways to Create Funny Moments

Thanks Sarah for your tips!One of the things I like to add in my books is funny moments. They keep intense parts of the book from being overwhelming, they give your readers a good feeling inside, and it gives you a great opportunity to use your writing skills.

1. Have a comic relief character. This can be someone who is always making well-intentioned mistakes; it can be someone who takes their job too seriously or it can be someone who is a bit rough and blunt. These types of characters give you great opportunities for making funny moments.

2. Have kids in your story. Children do some of the funniest things. If you don’t believe me, go watch a group of kids at play. They will say and do things that will have you on the floor in stitches.

3. Have and intense, scary, life threatening scene that leads to…. nothing. Think about it, we often worry about a situation or think something is going to be awful, and it ends up being no big deal. If written correctly, these can be really funny moments.

4. Have your main character make mistakes. Not only do these mistakes make them human, but they also can be very funny.

5. Have someone tell a joke in your story, but have it be poorly told so that no one laughs. This can be a little tricky, but also very funny.

6. Get off your computer! Half of creating funny moments is to have real life experiences to draw from. If you spend all your time on your computer you will miss a lot of life.

7. Have food moments. Have things spill at the wrong moment, get a guy covered in mashed potatoes, let the main character take a sip of tea and realize she put salt instead of sugar in it. How funny is that?

8. Have some silly misunderstandings. Have the Dad buy lamb instead of ham or the daughter get enough plates for two hundred instead of two dozen.

9. Let your characters have their habits and pet peeves. They could always wear something pink, make a big deal out of how you should eat pizza, or go on and on about one particular subject to the point of driving others mad.

10. Laugh more yourself. Watch more comedians, read a funny book, spend time with your younger siblings. Whatever it takes to make you laugh, do it.

Product Review! Rose of Sharon Acres #2

I received the following product in exchange for writing a review. While I consider it a privilege to receive free products to review, my review is my honest opinion and thoughts of the product.  This is part 2. Read part 1 here.

Rose Of Sharon Acres was kind enough to sponsor this review. I received the:

Jasmine Goat Milk Lotion

I found that this lotion is very helpful with my chapped hands as well as my elbows and heels it also keeps my hands moisturized It does not leave residue as other lotions do, my sisters liked this lotion very much, the lotion smells wonderful too!
Prices and sizes vary it also comes in a variety of scents.

Orange Blossom Goat Milk Cream With Mango Butter

I found that this product is very helpful in making my face soft, smooth and silky, it also is good for dry skin as it acts as a lotion mango butter has natural emollient properties. My sister RJ used this for her acne on her face and it cleared up completely it also made her face soft, smooth and silky. Prices and sizes vary, it also comes in a variety of scents.

Nails N Hair

This product helped strengthen me and my sisters nails it also helped my hair as I get split ends. Nails n hair is made with shave-grass/horsetail, as shave-grass helps make your nails and hair stronger. This tin costs $6.25 the Size is 1 oz.

Miss RL

Writing Tips: Accountability and Encouragement

Thanks Sarah for your tips!

As all you authors know, there are times when you know that you should write, but you just don’t want to. We also all go through times when we could use some words of encouragement. Recently I was talking to two friends of mine via Facebook who were having the same problem. So, we decided to do something about it.

We formed a closed group that we get on every day (well, almost) and post something that we have written and our word count. I have written almost 10,000 words since we started the group about a month ago. I also think that the thought that I will be sharing some of my work has helped the quality of my writing.


So, what about you? Are you feeling bogged down? Is it hard for you just to sit down and write? Do you feel like you could just use someone to say that your work is good every once in a while? Well, here are some ideas.


1. Maybe get one or two good writing friends and start a group. Make the goal to post something on there every day.


2. If you have just one good friend who writes, talk to them about becoming writing buddies. E-mail each other things that you have written, and encourage each other to keep writing.


3. Set goals for yourself and ask someone in your family or church to ask you if you are meeting your goals on a regular basis.


4. Give a copy of what you have written to a good friend as ask them what they think about it.

Do you have any wonderful ideas on how to keep you and your fellow writers accountable and give them encouragement?

Modest Monday: The Story Behind à la Modest

Not too long ago, I was invited to do a guest post for a fellow blogger’s site. Feel free to read the post below.

I started my blog, à la Modest, not to put up a righteous tone and prove that the way other people dress is wrong, but as a product of my need to express the new awakening in me of a desire to dress modestly. Neither my history nor my background predisposed me to dress the way I do now. My sense of style started out rather immodest, as I was always wanting to flaunt and attract just about everybody’s attention. Unbeknownst to anyone, I was engulfed by the darkness of insecurity. I fought and lost battles to achieve what I was lusting after—a certain look that I could never achieve, a status quo that I should never have been reaching for, and a desire from men that I should never have stolen. I can not even begin to describe how these things destroyed the way I lived and viewed life. I became dangerously anorexic wanting to achieve that model figure, dressed like typical MTV pop stars just to be like everyone else, and gave the wrong guys the time of day—all with the purpose of fulfilling that longing for love and appreciation.

Thankfully, God swept me away from all of that. He kept me physically pure after all those years, always nudging me back to His love before I lost myself completely. He provided me with an amazing husband who played a big part in my decision to dress modestly. Even though I was already informed of how certain clothes seduced men, it didn’t really stick in my brain or my heart as something immediate and of high importance until I heard it from someone I loved dearly. Isn’t that true for most of us—that we truly learn from experience and personal contact and not just through books or sermons? I did not deserve such a gift, or such mercy, but neither really does anyone else. God knew I needed Him so badly, because I cried out to Him day and night for some miraculous resolution in my shattered mind.

You’d think that marriage would have solved my insecurity, but you might think differently if you really considered how it exposes oneself to one person completely in all aspects, including physically and behaviorally. It did play a significant part in my healing process to know that someone loved me unconditionally, but being married to my husband did not solve my problem completely. God’s powerful intervention did. The combination of marriage, modesty values, and a sense of joyous satisfaction in my own body was what He brought to my life. I wish I had grasped the virtue of these things much earlier! It would have saved me from so much trouble. God was always knocking on my door, and I listened to everything else except His urging to give up the way I dressed. Clothing-wise, I was always rebelliously stubborn and cared way too much about having total control of the way I dressed. If I were to be faithful to both God and my husband, shouldn’t I have easily given up tight jeans and low-cut shirts? I made my own stand. I chose modesty.

This decision did not just change my choice of clothing. It changed my heart, my mind, and my actions. There was never anything I was so passionate about until I learned the importance of dressing modestly. I became very sensitive to how men’s minds work through the help of my husband and other men online, offline, and on paper. Women know fashion, but most of us do not really know too much about men’s deepest struggles.

My goal for à la Modest is to bridge this gap by showing other ladies how I manage to be stylish while being covered up. I do not just post photos of what I wear, but I also write about modest philosophies based on the Bible and the psychology of the sexes. I also share other things that I personally enjoy such as art, music, and movies, pulling out from them noteworthy and modest fashion inspirations!

So, hop on over to alamodest.com and say hi! I am not one to judge or criticize. I love all people—both men and women! My blog is not just about me, and it’s not just a fashion site. It’s for everyone!

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 This post was originally from à la Modest by Rachel Dahl. You can go directly to her website or Facebook for more posts on modesty. 

Writing Tips: Finished!

Thanks Sarah for your tips!

Like every story that must come to an end, like every book that must have a last page, so projects must come to an end. Ending them can be hard, because we, the author’s always can see room for improvement. We are our harshest critics and, therefore, the biggest obstacle that stands in the way of a completed project.

The first book in the current trilogy has been in the editing/polishing stage for almost two years, and now I am ready call it done. I have enjoyed the book a lot and still see some areas I would like to improve on. However, I have decided that after another round of editing, I will call it complete.

Learning when it is time to finally say that a book is complete is not easy. In fact, for me, it has been one of the most difficult decisions as an author the set a time to end revisions. I’m not sure it I have it all right, but we shall see.

The next step for me is sending a printout of the book to some of my good friends to tell me what they think of my book and any last things that need to be changed. My goal is to have my book ready to sell via Lulu Publishing toward the end of this year.

Why Did I Say That?

Why Did I Say That?
By Lisa Bode  

Why did I say that? A friend and I were chatting, and suddenly I opened my mouth and out came a stinging critical comment. Hours later I agonized. How could I have been so insensitive? Where did that rude sentiment come from? I’d never intended to come across that way.
Have you ever felt the same way, wishing you could press rewind on life and undo an impulsive statement? Ridiculing your sister amidst the tension of making lunch, repeating an off-color joke in a fun conversation with friends, wounding your mother with an angry accusation during a disagreement. Where do those words come from? We didn’t intend them, didn’t plan them, didn’t want them, but in the heat of the moment we opened our mouths and – out they came.
Jesus gives us an interesting insight in Matthew 12:34: “…For the mouth speaks out of that which fills the heart.” And a few chapters later He repeats Himself: “But the things that proceed out of the mouth come from the heart, and those defile the man.” – Matthew 15:18.
Where do those impulsive statements, those words so quickly regretted, where do they come from? They don’t come from nowhere. They come from the heart. The words we never meant to say spring directly from our thoughts.
That’s why I criticized my friend so harshly. I’d spent the previous week dwelling on critical thought – comparing myself with others, figuring that I was more spiritual, rejecting them and their activities and ideas. I didn’t intend to think these thoughts, and I certainly didn’t intend to speak them as words. And yet I allowed them to fester in my mind. I particularly remember one instance when I drove through the small town of Hamilton, letting my mind wander down a long list of critical thoughts all the way home. No wonder, when I found myself in a friendly conversation, did those thoughts suddenly take the form of words. They were just waiting for an opportunity to express themselves.
Our thoughts define our personality. Our thoughts determine our outlook on life. Our thoughts direct our words and actions. We are what we think!
Dear sisters, trying to control the tongue is a wise effort. All of us should pay careful attention to the words we say, and all of us should work to avoid evil and to speak what is right. But unless we also learn to control our thoughts, unless we first shine the light of God’s Truth on the heart, any attempt to control the tongue will be vain hypocrisy. It’s like painting a dying plant green, when what it really needs is water.
We must get to the root of the problem. The true solution to wrong words is not silence, or a superhuman effort to just be nice. The root of wrong words is simply this: wrong thoughts. The solution to the problem is then obvious: right thoughts.
It’s easy to ignore the thought life. We want to please people, and we often judge our righteousness by how accepted and affirmed we are. People notice, and praise or criticize, our words and actions. God is different. “…God sees not as man sees, for man looks at the outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart.” – 1 Samuel 16:7.
Thoughts do not fall outside the realm of right and wrong. Jesus made that clear in the Sermon on the Mount. The act of murder is sin. But the one who thinks a murderous thought is equally guilty. God sees and judges our innermost thoughts. “For the word of God is living and active and sharper than any two-edged sword, and piercing as far as the division of soul and spirit, of both joints and marrow, and able to judge the thoughts and intentions of the heart.” – Hebrews 4:12.
If you are like me, that’s a discouraging realization! Words and actions are difficult enough to control. But controlling my thought life? Thoughts tend to run away from me, like a million ants in a million directions, some right, some wrong. I’m innocently driving to the store or taking a shower, cleaning the kitchen or trying to fall asleep at night, and my thought life starts up. It’s easiest to just lie victim, to let my thoughts take over and run wherever they please. Down into the dregs of impurity, through the valleys of bitterness and rejection, wandering through criticism and comparison, worry and fear. I’m not doing or saying anything wrong. Is this still wrong?
Yes, it is still wrong. And these thoughts, if allowed to run free in my mind, will eventually express themselves in my words and actions. These thoughts will drain my joy and destroy my perspective.
God lays before us a directive in His Word. “We are destroying speculations and every lofty thing raised up against the knowledge of God, and we are taking every thought captive to the obedience of Christ….” – 2 Corinthians 10:5.
Controlling your thought life is difficult. But it is not impossible! God never fails to enable us to obey His commands, which means in this case that He will give, that He in fact has given to you and me the grace we need to control our thoughts, and not be controlled by them. We must take every thought, these millions of scurrying ants, captive, and bring them under the light of His Truth.
The thoughts that are wrong we must reject. In a practical sense, this means that as I’m driving home through Hamilton, I recognize my critical thoughts as sin. I repent before God. And I immediately direct my thoughts in a right direction.
What is a right direction? What should you and I think about – on the road, in the shower, doing dishes, falling asleep?
Focus your thoughts on Jesus Christ and on His character. Let your mind dwell on His work in your life, and His Truth proclaimed in His Word.
I’m not talking about some “super-spiritual” exercise like reciting Scripture all day long to try to earn extra brownie points with God. I’m talking about the special delight of focusing my thoughts on what is true and lovely. Instead of thinking on bitterness and criticism while I comb my hair, I try to be thinking things like:
“God chose me before the foundation of the world. He loves me with an everlasting love. He will never leave me nor forsake me. This specific situation He’s working out for my good. He has prepared good works for me to do today. What might they be? How should I do them? Who can I love today?”
Do these thoughts come naturally? No. I must actively choose to think them.
And where do these thoughts originate? The Word of God. I must spend time daily reading and studying His Word, memorizing it as I am able, immersing my mind in His Truth, and thereby recognizing which thoughts are lies.
The devil is always looking for a foothold in our thoughts. We are sinful by nature, and temptation continues. Daily the struggle against wrong thoughts repeats itself. But it must be a struggle – we must not give in!
Wrong thoughts rejected. Right thoughts accepted. And the next step will flow naturally. We will open our mouths to speak, in the heat of the moment, at the peak of a conversation, and our words will reflect where our minds have been. In the Word of God. ©

Modesty DOES Matter

This post is labeled for readers 14 and older. If you are below this range, please ask your parents before reading. Otherwise, enjoy! 

Below is my response to Ed Gungor’s article, “Does Modesty Really Matter?” on Relevant Magazine:

Ed, I very much agree that we should all examine our own hearts before taking out the plank in someone else’s eye. I am glad that you were honest about what you felt about colored tights and the way they related to the image of pornography. Men are wired to remember stimulating images, and you are no different.

That said, however, I think your article addressed the issue of judging more than the issue of modesty. Does modesty matter? Yes, it does. The passage you quoted and many others that are found in the Bible tell us so (e.g. 1 Tim 2:9-10, 1 Tim 3:1-6, 1 Peter 3:1-6, etc.). Modesty is primarily an issue of the heart that goes beyond clothing, but we must also not draw attention to ourselves in a way that causes men to stumble. It’s easier for a man to lust over a woman who is showing a lot of skin versus a woman who isn’t. The Bible makes it clear that a man who lusts in his mind is already committing adultery (Matt 5:27-28). Why would I want to contribute to that? I cannot totally eradicate the way men think about me, but I can help them not notice my sexual parts as much.

I am a big fan of C.S. Lewis, but when he wrote about cultural norms, he did not have the internet. The introduction of media such as TV and the internet led to globalization. Cultures collided and have become more centralized and Americanized. I grew up in the Pacific Islands, and I can vouch for the way media has significantly changed our cultural norms, including our fashion. The same group of people from the Pacific and everywhere else in the world are looking at American pornography. That said, the majority of people all over the world can come to a consensus as to what is sexually stimulating.

Yes, modesty values are subjective. Yet, what I do know is that regardless of the decade we’re living in or the geographical area we reside in, there are certain areas of a woman’s body that are always stimulating to men, especially when accentuated. America is especially obsessed with women’s breasts, so that is why showing cleavage through low-cut blouses and bikinis is sexually stimulating. Sadly, it seems like America has stripped down its standards to what is modest as being what is legally permitted (covering sexual organs) in public. That to me is the extreme. As to what is borderline for most, such as wearing skinny jeans, tank tops, or brightly colored tights, it seems that there can be debate even among Christians. The obvious is covering up or concealing at best the areas of the body that are predominantly sexually stimulating:  the chest,the hips, etc, etc.

I run a modest fashion site at alamodest.com. I do not judge or criticize people on specific borderline details of how they dress, because I know that it is not my right to do so. Only Christ can be the judge over our hearts and the reason behind our clothing lifestyle. What I do write about is based on my own personal experience, aiming to inspire other women with my fashion and help people understand my philosophy based on the Bible and the evidential psychology of the male and female mind.

To be honest, I think that it is honorable for a man to gather up the courage to tell another woman that she is causing him to lust. It is harder for a man to be this vulnerable and honest about his own weakness than for him to just ignore it or enjoy and indulge in the object of his lust. As with insanity, the first step to healing lust is admittance to or repentance from his own weakness. I believe it should be okay for a man to approach a woman with sincerity and admit that his weakness is being captive to the lust caused by the way she dresses. This to me is a cry for help from a brother we must embrace rather than a judgmental fool who needs to be slapped because of his pointing finger. It all depends on the way the man approaches the woman, be it with sincerity and humility or with accusation and a scolding tone. How else would I have started to dress modestly if not for my husband’s (then fiancee’s) telling me when my clothing tempted him and possibly others? I would not have learned this telepathically from anyone else in their silence. The men who used to gawk at me may have just been indulging in what they saw and not having the humility to tell me that what I was wearing, something too low-cut or short, was possibly seductive, as a loving brother would have.

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 This post was originally from à la Modest by Rachel Dahl. You can go directly to her website or Facebook for more posts on modesty. 

Writing Tips: Help!

Thanks Sarah for your tips!

The halfway point in any book is often the most challenging to write. Many people come to the middle of their story and get discouraged and end up not finishing their book, so today, I would like to address some of the common problems that people have.

“I just don’t feel like going on.”

Sometime, after finishing the first part of the book, the initial excitement wears off and the amount of works seems overwhelming. One of the things that keeps me going is to keep something around that reminds me of the essence of the story. For a long time, I kept a small wooden carving of the fish symbol in view. For me, that reminded me of an important part of the story. You might also trying doing some writing warm-ups (see Jessica’s post) to get you started every day. In the end, some of it is just keeping on track, even when it’s hard.

“I just don’t know what to write about. I’m stuck!”

Often the middle of our books is a bridge from the beginning to our build up to the climax. That bridge is often the most boring to write and to get ideas for. One of the things you can do is to think about what information needs to be in those chapters. Another thing that might be helpful is working your plot backwards. Last but not least, you could try to taking a short break from writing. A few days sometimes helps clear your mind

“Is it okay to start another book and then come back to this one?”

This is a harder question to answer because there are so many variables. In general though, I tell people not to abandon their projects. Have only a lot of half finished books laying around can be very discouraging. I know that there are things that sometimes you would rather write about, but there is a lot of value in sticking a project out.

Do you have any ideas what you can do if you are stuck in the middle of your book?

Modest Monday: Modesty and Romance

 As requested by RJ, this post is labeled for readers 14 and older. If you are below this range, please ask your parents before reading. Otherwise, enjoy! 

Two posts ago, I talked about Lolita fashion and its roots from the Victorian age. Even taking bustiers into account, you have to admit that fashion back then was much more modest than today. A friend of mine likes to view dressing modestly as a way to feel like royalty–a princess finely dressed. Centuries might have affected fashion trends, but men’s minds have not changed over the years. This is not to say that men alone are evil. They were made to be visual, and women were made to desire love from men. We just have to cater to our nature of being like this in the right way. Immodesty is like junk food. It satisfies you temporarily and is never good for you. Showing skin to attract men (or even to compete with women) might get you the attention you want, but it is almost never love that you end up getting.As I like to say, “Keep immodesty within the marriage bed!” Married women can get all the fun they want with lingerie as clothes for their husband’s eyes only! Ironically, I only really took the importance of modest fashion to heart when I got married. I’ve never really been happier with the way I carried myself since I started pushing away my insecurities by not wearing clothes that attracted the wrong attention. I realized that I gave away part of myself to other men through the way I dressed, and essentially stole from my husband what he alone should’ve cherished.To the single women out there, it is best to start now. I understand how hard it is to even attract men in this day and age, where sexually infused fashion is rampant, but it will pay off one day to be with someone who cares deeply about who you are, enough to protect you from himself. When you incite a man to lust, you do not win him. Lust takes over, and it is greedy. Like any type of greed, it wants more. Do not expect that luring a man with lust will keep him faithful to you. Modesty is not really the end-all to lust, but it certainly helps to keep minds pure.In addition to its benefits to single men and women, dressing modestly can help couples in a small way by not adding to the temptation that husbands and even pastors have everyday to look at other women lustfully. Let’s not be greedy and steal their minds away. Lust really eats up men, and contrary to the momentary pleasures they might get from it, they ultimately do not like its effects. Doing your part says that you love all men and want to help them see the beauty in you through purity and not lust. Purity goes a long way. It’s not really synonymous with chastity. You can be pure and be sexually active in the context of marriage. Most guys deep down want a girl who will give them everything without inhibitions but only to them. If you give yourself to other men by inciting lust in their minds through the way that you dress, then you are not really saving yourself fully for your future husband. The Bible says that if a man looks at or thinks about another woman lustfully, then he is already committing adultery. In your own small way, by dressing modestly, you really are helping to tame lustful thoughts. It shows that you really care, and in turn, most “husband-material” guys will appreciate this a lot.Dressing “down” gave me many heartaches. It attracted so many of the wrong type of guys. I’m glad that God was sovereign and landed me with an amazing husband who encouraged me to be modest-fashionably forward (even before we got married).

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 This post was originally from à la Modest by Rachel Dahl. You can go directly to her website or Facebook for more posts on modesty.

Writing Tips: Balancing the Sad and Happy.

 By Miss Sarah H.

Sometimes some of you want write tearjerkers (I don’t know why you would but okay : ), ones that are so sad they make us cry. Sometimes we want to write feel good books, ones when that leave us laughing or just feeling like the world is as is it should be. However, most of the time, at least for me, I want to achieve a balance between the two.

I want my books to leave you feeling good, but for you and my characters to go through hard stuff to get to that happy ending. I want you to feel sad, angry and scared along with my characters but I also what you to be able to feel relief, happiness and joy with them as well. I want there to be intense moments and a lot of tension, but I want to leave my readers feeling satisfied.

So how do we do it? How do we achieve that balance? The answer is; I am still learning. Here are a few things that I have learned, feel free to correct and add to this list.

1. Never kill off any of the good guys or girls in the last three chapters. From a readers perspective, if I am to get that good feeling at the ending, you can’t kill a good guy too close to the end.

2. Temper your intense and very sad scene with humor where it is appropriate. Where humor is unacceptable, it might be good to use and ah-ha moment. You know, a moment when your character reaches a goal, figures out the clue, or grasps a very hard to understand concept.

3. Sometimes there are scenes that just have to be sad, hard and/or intense though and through. To keep those in balance, I like to follow them up with a humors or joyous scene.

4. Book cannot (for the most part) be happy all the way though if they are to be any good. One of the things that I have learned in life and in writing is that sometimes you have to go through the bad or see the evil to appreciate the good.

What about you? How do think we can achieve that balance between happy and sad? I would love to hear your ideas/thoughts even if you aren’t a writer.

Modest Monday: Keeping Modest During Summer

The first few months after surrendering to modest fashion were not easy. I was especially not a fan of summer months as just over a year ago, I had been bearing it all out with the least clothing I could wear on my body to keep myself cool and circulated. Summer was and is the most difficult season to remain fashionably pure. I did not care less about style than I do now, but I did ignore modesty. I just cared about wanting to look “good” like everyone else, but that was exactly where I stumbled—wanting to look like everybody else. While I disliked posers, copycats, social climbers, and being “in” on the latest trends, I failed to notice myself in the mirror echoing back a reflection I did not want to see.  In spite of my goals of individuality and looking “nice,” I became what I did not want to be because I allowed myself to be taken over by the status quo heat. Running after fast-paced worldly trends got too tiresome, and I wanted to find retreat deep within the quiet corners of my soul. The transformation came through an emotional outpouring, which changed the way I viewed and carried myself to a manner virtuous and lady-like in my heart through my clothing.

After relating a little background on my old summer shrieking dilemma, I’ve decided to write about beating the summer heat and the status quo fashion through modesty.

• Instead of shorts or tight pants, I switched to long flowing skirts or knee-length skirts. I have always had trouble looking for a good pair of shorts or pants. My anatomy has been graced/cursed with the pear shape a.k.a. “the classic woman shape”. Especially with the models today who are pencil thin from top to bottom, looking at catalogs and mannequins usually resulted in my being disappointed by my purchases. The switch was easy. It is more enjoyable for me anyway to wear leggings or tights with a tunic, dress, or skirt and at the same time cover up my basement’s silhouette. Surprisingly, I never knew that part of me was attractive until someone in my high school talked about it in my dance group. He really was the last person I would’ve wanted to be around. To my disgust, I really didn’t attract the right kind of guys back then.
• Instead of tank tops, spaghetti straps, and tube tops, I switched to airy blouses with light material or loose sleeveless shirts. I layer my blouses with accessories (brooches, scarves, necklaces, etc.) or just choose a really eccentric-looking top to go with the bottom. This helps not to associate modesty with Plane Jane. Tank tops and their many varieties have become things of the past and inferior pieces to the sophisticated look I strive for. I hope I have somewhat achieved it!
• Instead of bikinis or monokinis, I switched to a one-piece bathing suit or a tankini with a high-neck and full butt coverage. When asked if I would be comfortable modeling swimsuit for a modest apparel store, I graciously declined. I think that photos of women in even modest swimwear can be showing too much. Wearing a swimsuit in public is already a compromise for me—let alone taking photos posted all around the internet and catalogs wearing an attire made for bathing. I do not condemn, however, modest swimsuit modeling. It is simply a personal decision of mine to decline such an offer. My husband and I also have made it a point to avoid public beaches and pools to minimize the temptation of reverting back to our old “habits.” This isn’t a necessity for everyone, but personally, we just find it best for both of us to avoid the skin parading at the beach. It helps to keep his mind from overworking to remain pure and helps to keep me from wanting to flaunt my body in public. We are both capable and very much guilty of lusting! Here’s an anecdote: I bought a retro monokini at a store as my first “modest” purchase. Wearing it, it turned out, that it was even sexier than my bikinis. It was still showing a lot of cleavage and butt, so I had it excommunicated from my sight. It was hard because it was such a gorgeous piece, but I knew how horrible of an effect there would be on family men and children who saw me wearing it in public and in photos.
• Instead of clothes with showy cuts or slits that showed skin, I switched to clothes with bold patterns or details. One-of-a-kind patterns, bold colors, big vintage buttons, over-sized bows, and intricate details on clothes get as much attention as thigh-temptress slits, shoulder-showing asymmetrical tops, and chest-charming raindrop peek-a-boo’s. You can get the same clean and rewarding effect without showing skin or accentuating the more sexy parts of the body.
• Instead of showing too much leg, I switched to colored and patterned tights and socks. However, I didn’t get rid of all my dresses and skirts that were too short. I found that it was more interesting anyway to wear them with colored or patterned tights and socks. I subsequently fell in love with the variety of socks I could wear—especially bobby socks and knee-high socks! I also kept my one pair of skinny jeans to wear underneath a tunic or a short dress.
• As for the other priceless pieces I kept from the past: I collected a vast amount of wonderful clothes that fit the “high-fashion” look over the years that weren’t very modest. I got rid of some but kept some of the pieces that I knew I could get creative with through layering. Some of the clothing that I used to wear in public, I now only wear at home around my husband or in the bedroom. I kept some of the old, but I made sure to rarely if ever buy new clothes that were alone, without layering, immodest. There is already enough temptation sometimes for me to wear my old clothes as-is without putting something else beneath them.

This list might sound too religious, but I really am not trying to sound that way. As you might notice, I am referring to what I did with my own wardrobe instead of telling you what you should be doing. Everybody has their own standard, especially with modesty. I haven’t even touched on the nitty-gritty details of what style choices I avoid that aren’t in every Proverbs woman’s modesty book. On the other hand, I know for certain that I haven’t even grazed the level of modesty some devout women live by. There is always someone with a higher (or lower) standard of modesty than I, but all of them are doing their best to honor it. I just live by godly principles that I acquired through personal transformation, not by religiosity, which I express through various forms including my clothing.

~Rachel

Writing Tips: 10 Things to Avoid when Writing

By Miss Sarah H.

1. Avoid sermons. Most people do not like reading through sermons. If they had wanted to read a book on theology they would not have picked up a fiction book. If you want to make a point, weave it into your stories.

2. Avoid arguments that lead to change. Everyone I know only changes when someone loves them and encouraged them, not when they are yelled at.

3. Avoid lengthy descriptions. If you spend five pages describing a room, your readers might get board and never pick up your book again.

4. Avoid giving little to no descriptions. My test readers have often wondered where exactly I have placed them because I haven’t given them enough description.

5. Avoid rewriting until you finished the first draft of you book. You will do the rewriting, but if you do it before you have finished your book, it might slow you down to the point you don’t want to finish your book.

6. Avoid magic. I understand that fantasy can be so much fun but we need to remember that God doesn’t use magic.

7. Avoid sibling rivalry and arguments. The world has enough of that already, we need some positive influence.

8. Avoid a strictly serious book. Lighten up and add a little humor to your story. The world could use a few more smiles.

9. Avoid characters that all look and sound alike. Have some variety.

10. Avoid the bad guys. Remember, they are out to get you. Look behind you! Sorry, I couldn’t resist putting this as the last one.

His Perfect Love

His Perfect Love

By Havilah C. Worden

The last velvety petal of a once graceful rose falls to the ground.

A lovely young girl becomes ill.
A precious, long-awaited infant is born – dead.
In the midst of all of this you ask the question,
Where is God?
Where is Love?
Why?
In the stormy days,
When things don’t go as planned,
When hope is gone,
We tend to blame Him.
Why?
Why do we blame the One who said,
“Greater love hath no man than this, that a man
Lay down his life for his friends”?
The one who not only said it but did it – for you.
Do we not understand His Love?
His Perfect Love?
The love that sometimes allows inconveniences, sadness, despair
– for you.
We can catch but a glimpse of His perfect plan, and
We rarely can understand it, but
We can trust and watch the beauty unfold.
And when that rose blooms we will know that He knew best all along.
Will you trust – His Perfect Love? ©

Used with permisson

Recipe Of The Week #38 Chocolate Cupcakes Recipe

Chocolate Cupcakes Recipe

(makes 12 cupcakes)

Ingredients

5 oz (150gms) softened butter
5 oz (150gms) superfine caster sugar
2 tablespoons cocoa powder
6 oz (175gms) self raising flour
3 eggs
1 teaspoon vanilla extract

Method

1 Firstly pre-heat your oven to 350F (180C).

2 Line a 12 cup cake pan, with cup cake papers.

3 Crack the eggs into a cup and beat lightly with a fork, then place all the ingredients in a large bowl and mix with an electric mixer for 2 minutes, until light and creamy.

4 Divide the mixture evenly between the cake cases and bake in the oven for around 15 – 20 minutes until the cupcakes have risen and are firm to touch.

5 Transfer the cupcakes to a wire rack, allow to cool before icing.

Thank you to Craig W. for this recipe.